Ever since the finale I see all these people talking about Elena’s choice and how ‘wrong’ her reasons were. I would’ve much preferred Elena to chose Damon but I think people got the wrong idea when Elena said ‘maybe if you and I had met first.’
I don’t think she was choosing Stefan because she met him first. I think she was talking about how it would have been much easier for them to be together if Stefan hadn’t been the first one to make a move on Elena.
She wouldn’t have felt this guilty for wanting and loving her boyfriends brother. Elena felt guilty for wanting her boyfriends brother just as Damon felt guilty for wanting his brothers girl. She just wanted to say that the circumstances would have been much different if they met before her and Stefan did.

…If Damon hadn’t compelled her to forget.
That’s also another point, if Damon hadn’t compelled her and if they became friends, flirted and dated, things would have been much different. The journey we all saw wouldn’t have happened. The story would have been told much differently. They wouldn’t be the same Damon and Elena. I don’t know if it’s a good thing or a bad thing but I don’t think the timing would have been right if Damon hadn’t compelled her. It wouldn’t have made much difference then, but now… after everything they have been through together, when Elena remembers the memories Damon compelled her to forget including their first meeting, it will have a much bigger impact.